Where I gather my thoughts and transform my sea of emotions into written words, so that I may let them rest somewhere other than in my heart or head.
You said we couldn’t fix this. You hung up on me. You blocked my number. You’ve put up your walls. You’ve shut the door. You’ve sealed up your windows. There’s no way in to you now. I can’t text you. I can’t call you. I can’t see you. I can’t explain. I can’t question. I can’t reason with you. You’ve pushed me away...
I hate that you left me. I hate that I’m questioning my worthiness now. I hate that just as I am starting to truly love myself, you have me questioning if I’m lovable. If I’m enough. I hate that you’ve gotten into my head. I hate that your choices, your actions, your mistakes are making me think less of myself. I hate that I ironically feel the need to protect you. That...
You sit there high up on your throne. In your room of darkness. Picking my life apart. Creating lists of choices not good enough. Negativity taking over. You shape your words into bullets. Stacking up your ammo. Guilt creeps in. You push it down. You turn it around. You look to me to blame. Ammo surrounds you. Animosity dripping from your brow. You pick up a word – a bullet. You aim it at...
An unexpected visit. 4 days of laughter and food. Cuddles and stories. Big hugs and Asian kisses. Today, we say goodbye. Waving as they drive away. The house is quiet. Somber. Holding back tears. Extra hugs with the kids. Time to clean up. Dishes are washed. Counters are cleaned. Towels are washed. Bathrooms are cleaned. Blankets are washed. Floors are cleaned. All is done. House is clean. Like...
I’ve been struggling with where this writing journey of mine is headed. In the last month, I’ve been drawn to do things that my soul has been craving. I’ve been writing. Taking photos. Updating my blog. Sharing my work. But where is this going? What is going to become of all of this? What is the end goal? I have no clue and today, my wonderful husband gently reminded me that...
The roosters crow. The hunting dogs bark. The sound of a car driving by on the 2 lane highway can be heard in the distance. A cool, crisp Arkansas morning breeze squeezes through the cracked window. The scent of earth dances in the air – soil, grass, the morning dew. Light shines through the sheer curtains and across the bed. My eyes open. There’s a smile on my face. I can hear the...
