I hate that you left me.
I hate that I’m questioning my worthiness now.
I hate that just as I am starting to truly love myself, you have me questioning if I’m lovable.
If I’m enough.
I hate that you’ve gotten into my head.
I hate that your choices, your actions, your mistakes are making me think less of myself.
I hate that I ironically feel the need to protect you.
That I’m hesitant to share my story because of what people would think of you.
I hate that I feel partially responsible for how you act just because we once shared the same last name.
I hate that even as an adult, I sought your approval.
That I felt your approval contributed to my worth.
But you’ve done me a favor.
You’ve made it very clear where you stand.
It’s crystal clear. Cut and dry. Black and white.
And with that, I can move on.
I don’t need your approval.
I don’t need your love that was only given under certain conditions.
I don’t need your fake smile or heavy breathing or judgmental eyes.
I am worthy.
I am lovable.
I am okay.
You showed me your priorities.
You walked out of my life.
I can move forward with a clear conscious now.
There’s nothing I could have ever done to make you happy.
That doesn’t make me bad or broken or unworthy or unlovable.
That makes you an unhappy person.
Goodbye, Dad.
Truth
T